Visit Six: February
Boy, did I need that invisibility cloak today. I really didn't want to come this morning. I hurt pretty badly (all week), and I think it's worse today. After a week of this, I am not really in emotional control and ready to be pleasant, and that nostalgia factor always makes it hard for me to avoid tears leaking out of my eyes.
Is there a way for me to wear a DO NOT TOUCH sign in church without offending people? They take their greeting time seriously, and my hands already hurt so badly that I kind of can't imagine how bad it will be after all that hand shaking.
I had to get up to let folks in and out of the row about 15 times today, and I have a bruise on both calves from my clumsiness and over-sensitivity to physical touch and the theater seats you have to shove up to let folks through. All week I have been lying to people at work as they ask how I am, and I am very prickly as a result.
On his way out, the pastor, who recognized me even after being on a trip to Africa for the last three weeks, asked how I am, and I told him quite honestly that I'm in a lot of pain. He asked why, and I mumbled something about fibromyalgia flare-up, and he stopped his progress to the exit and prayed for me.
I would give him extra points if he hadn't also put an arm around me (he was very gentle, it just doesn't matter when I’m this flared up), but since I can't imagine this happening at any other church I've visited or been a member of since I left the church I grew up in (and maybe not even there), I will give bonus points for that.
The kids went up to the front this week to be prayed for with all the other kids. They are looking forward to next week because the kids are leading the service, and they both have jobs to perform. I think we have a winner.
I'm still waiting for the Pentecostal shoe to drop, but it is nice to feel like a part of the greater body again, and I am not going to let my concern about potential future weirdness destroy this moment where I am right now. But I am totally going to get an aisle seat on the outside edge next time.